I published the original story on 10/20/2013 in Both Turkish and English as one post. Here it is in English only.
You and I
I am an unhappy one. I am lonely despite all the people around me. I am a grumpy one. Despite all those smiles I serve around, I am a grumpy one against myself. I am a hopeless one. Even if my dreams are beyond my horizons; I am the one who cannot think about tomorrow, cannot live in today never forgetting yesterday.
I cannot sleep. I get myself too tired; so I bury myself into the depth of darkness. I am insomniac; even when I close my eyes, my mind does not sleep, keeps thinking about about all necessaries and unnecessaries. I do not take rest at nights; contrarily, I sleep my eyes open my mind with you. When you look at me from outside, I am twenty-five; if you can see my inside, I am fifty.
I am amnesiac. I forget a lot; I forget what I am saying in my speech. Sometimes, I forget what i am doing; there has been times that I forgot who I was. I forgot my identity. Really, who am I? Who is my family, whom I love, whom I am in love with? For who would I die; for who would I live? Do I die? Did I die, am I alive??
I am sorrowful. To most, I have everything; some even considers me rich. I don't have anything; I don't have anyone, I am solitary. Am I anyone? I am no-one; like she says, I am the one unlike anyone. My soul is sad, my heart is filled with sorrow. My eyes are teary, they drop in my soul for the whole time.
I am sick. My body is sick, my soul is sick, my heart is sick. If my body decided to collapse, probably it has a good reason for it. My mind should have a reason; maybe it is a traveller like me, but likes to travel without me. I have a heart; it is tired, it is hardly beating lub-dub lub-dub lub-dub.. Dont stop my heart; keep working. Keep pumping that endless love; until my mind loses me, until my soul gets tired of my body, until my soul comes off your body..
